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Jezzany
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Name: Jessica
Birthday: 5/2/1984
Gender: Female
Interests: Fav Quote: "I can't pick a side, either way I look at it I'm right."--Paris, Gilmore Girls
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
Member Since:
4/13/2003
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| I'm a student again.
It feels a little strange. After having graduated and been out of school for almost 2 years.
Heh, I feel a sense of superiority to the normal students that is totally undeserved. Like, I've seen more of life than you and have entered that post college world, if briefly. Even if the sense is false, it's kinda nice, I mean it's always nice to feel confident.
Well, I'd been doing well on my eating but this weekend I totally ditched my diet. Now it's Monday . . . going to try and start anew with more drive! Looking at all these skinny nineteen yearolds is a little motivating. It's a good kick in the butt. I mean for most of the last year or so I've been in situations where I was one of the most attractive girls and also one of the slimmest or at least on par with everyone else . . . well those situations involve living out in the middle of no where for one!
Now, I know that I'm not fat. I weigh 135 lbs right now. Still I think losing about 15 to 20 lbs would give an extra strut in my step which is quite enjoyable. It'll be the best if I can do this by simply exercising more and eating smaller portions and healthier food. Then I'll just be improving my health.
So on that note I went to the GYM at school on friday and looked around. I tried out a couple of their cardio machines. I was unhappy with the elliptical like machine . . . it was harder, burned less calories, and made my knee hurt within 2 mins! There is another cardio machine that I don't like so much, but I know I can do and it won't put stress on my knee. Also, good news, I do really like their treadmills. It felt nice to run on and the machine includes programs which is hard to come by on a treadmill.
Funny story. I was doing a little running on the treadmill. Picked up my waterbottle to take a drink. Tipped it over to drink out of the opening and the entire top fell off with a splash! All this water went onto the machine and my clothes. I just kept on running for a few more minutes lol, and then went to the bathroom got some paper towels and cleaned it up. I don't even think anyone noticed. :) P.S. I finished The Footprints of God last night. But forgot to bring a new book with me to campus today. 1 down 51 to go. | | |
| It's interesting to take Penny for a walk in the neighbourhood. Mostly college students, single adults, some couples, and the odd family. The housing is mostly one bedroom, but there are 2 bedroom places. Anyway.
I got some interesting looks. I don't know if it's because I have a dog, a dog that's a german sheperd, or both.
Well Penny isn't a large German Sheperd and I personally don't think she looks threatening at all.
And compared to my neighbours . . . well. The apartment next to mine houses 2 Pitbulls! And the apartment after that 2 Rottweilers! | | |
| I haven't posted much lately b/c the only things I had to say involved me, my problems, and my depression which makes everything seem so much worse. But, as my nifty title suggests, I feel a change in the winds. For the first time in a while I can say that several things are good in my life. Not that some things weren't good before, but they certainly didn't make up for the bad things. Well, the key to this of course, is better meds. I'm actually beginning to feel normal again, well normal for me anyway. But . . . also, I'm getting a puppy, a German Shepard girl I've named Penny (short for Penelope). The idea of having her to take care of and train, and for her to love me and depend on me. Well it's quite an uplifting idea. Plus I've wanted a puppy for a very long time, but of course it wasn't practical, well, I decided to screw practicality because it wasn't getting me anywhere good. (not that I went crazy :) And I may have stumbled on a guy, who is, as the British would say, seems quite "lovely"--which is not at all a feminine term there (I've been there recently). I could call him great, awesome, or even super (okay that's British too) but I like "lovely." And in the process I've managed to put some things behind me, if not in the dump, well at least in a box in the garage getting mold and dust all over it and providing a home for numerous insects and perhaps a couple mice--who I invite to gnaw on the box and its contents all they like. Jessica | | |
| So I was going to post this last night, but I was too depressed to blog. I think sanity is like a jenga game. Slowly, one by one, the blocks are taken away. Each one making you more and more unstable, untill finally someone/something removes that last block and you just topple over. (Then you have to rebuild, and we all know rebuilding a jenga tower sucks). | | |
| I woke up last night/this morning and had no idea what time it was. I resisted checking the time, and started to doze back off when I dreamed I checked a clock and it was 4:12. So I begrudgingly decided I should really check the clock and guess what time it was? 4:12. Strange. And now a dream that nobody will probably care about. I was one of the last lines of research for the government against a disease that was infecting the world. People infected often turned and tried to infect as many other people as possible. One of this group broke into the high security building I was living in with the intent of infecting me. (they discovered that a new way to infect others just by holding eye contact had developed BUT the person doing the infecting had to purposefully want to infect the other person). Anyway this guy/man caught a hold of me and started whispering things in my ear about how I was going to enjoy it and I found myself irresistably attracted to him (the vampire complex?). It was quite a delicious tingling of attraction mixed in with terror. Anyway, (although I didn't know this at the time) he was so suprised that I was attracted to him that he found he couldn't do it (nice and sentimental huh) and so he left. Fortunately for the story it didn't end there. Although the gov't moved me to an even higher security area containing weird things we won't talk about my man developed a way to teleport into buildings and came to see me. In the end our union created disease free babies. The prospect of being able to have children and a life pacified the infected people and the world was at peace once more. The scientists were able to develop a vaccine and the world was saved. Woohoo. I love dreams. | | |
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